An Unexpected Christmas Gift - Creative Writing Essay Example

A beautiful woman in her 30s is sitting on the couch talking on her cell phone. There is a Christmas tree in the corner. The festive table is set for two. A new man's suit is hanging on a hall-stand.

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HELEN [on the phone]: Really? That big? And earrings too? Oh my! And what did you get for him? Woolen? Spendaholic! Me? A suit! Yes, no kidding. I'm hoping for a Lamborgini at the very least - [she is interrupted by a loud noise from the direction of the window, a half-naked man climbs in]

HELEN: Oh my! Don't approach me! Who are you? What are you doing here?

WILLIAM: I have just landed on your balcony. I am from the apartment above.

HELEN: Our new neighbor?

WILLIAM: Rather, I am your new neighbor's wife's - hmm - let's say "friend". You know, all the usual suspects [he giggles]: a suspicious husband returns home unexpectedly from a business trip and -

HELEN: [pushing him in the direction of the balcony]: Your story is fascinating but you need to go now. My suspicious husband is about to come too - right now. Our neighbor Mary on the second floor is single, a poor old spinster, and you can actually -

GEORGE [opening the door]: Honey, I'm home!

HELEN: So am I!

GEORGE [noticing William, who is quickly rushing off onto the balcony]: What is this?

HELEN [pointing at the suit]: What? This? This is your Christmas present!

GEORGE: That is a nice present indeed! Running around in red boxers. Red! Come on! You know I hate this color!

HELEN: How many times do I have to tell you that it becomes you! It harmonizes with your eyes! And nose!

GEORGE: Now does it? So, why is this naked skinny minnie wearing boxers that "harmonize" as you say with my eyes and nose?

HELEN: Technically, he was not naked. His - mind you, not yours - his red boxers were still on him. And he was not that skinny after all, did you see his belly -

GEORGE: Shut up! Are you cheating on me?

HELEN: I barely know him!

GEORGE: It's even worse! You are cheating on me with a man you barely know! You've lost all your scruples, woman!

HELEN: I can explain! He was above -

GEORGE: What?

HELEN: Yes, that's right! I was lying on the sofa when he -

GEORGE: Spare me the details!

HELEN: You don't understand, darling! I was waiting for you, I bought you a present - this suit.

GEORGE: Oh, this is surely his suit!

HELEN: But, darling, you can't be serious. He's got a bigger size!

GEORGE: So, now you are humiliating me!

HELEN: Wait, listen, he has just climbed down from our neighbor's apartment.

GEORGE: How can you prove that?

HELEN: His lover's called Jenny, you know, long legs, full breasts, a dragon tattoo on her thigh.

GEORGE: Dragon tattoo on her thigh ... Hmm ... What color is it?

HELEN: Red and green. In the true Christmas spirit [both chuckle].

HELEN: Wait a second! How do you know about her tattoo?

GEORGE: I ... I helped her fasten her bandage once! Remember, she broke her arm last year?

HELEN: So, why were you fastening the bandage on her thigh?

GEORGE: It slid down, I swear! You know, how slippery these bandages are!

HELEN [approaching him with a menacing look]: I don't, but you will find out soon enough.

GEORGE: Stop it, honey! Come on! She is not my type at all. You are my type! Who would even look at her? Right, man?

HELEN: Sure! Who would? Long legs, full breasts, big blue eyes, blond hair ... So, what is your type then, bro? [bitterly] I am your type. Let me guess - short legs, no breast -

GEORGE: Honey, you are so wrong! You know I love you! You are clever and kind and ... and ... your lasagna is perfect!

HELEN: I'm certainly not that clever if I married you! And you should have praised my lasagna when you were complaining to your mother about my cooking! Liar!

GEORGE: But no, honestly, your lasagna is perfect! After all, it's from "Luigi's"

HELEN [approaching William with the same menacing look]: Are you still here?

WILLIAM: Yes, and I think, I can help you! I can help us!

HELEN: You have already helped enough!

GEORGE: Wait! I am a psychologist after all. We must calm down, let's sit here, on the sofa and talk a little. [He sits down on the sofa and suddenly discovers bright yellow men's boxers under a cushion.

HELEN [with a frightened expression]: These are mine!

GEORGE [patting the sofa beside him]: Come, honey, come, sit down. We will talk about it too. After all the shouting we have done, we need to finally talk.