The Rise of Divorce within the United States - Paper Example

Introduction

There has been a dramatic increase in the United States' divorce rates over the last two decades. Most of those affected by the divorce incidences are the young Americans, resulting in much stress among the individuals involved. Most of the victims have to deal with the effects of living alone, never seeing their children, and more responsibilities associated with the legal processes. The effects of such incidences can also be felt by the children where they may feel inadequate among their friends. Despite what others may feel, the US's divorce rates are drastically increasing mainly because of a lack of commitment by the couples, financial problems, and little to no premarital counseling.

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Lack of Commitment

As reported by 75% of individuals and by at least one person in 94.4% of couples, lack of commitment is the most common contributing factor to divorce (Clarke-Stewart & Brentano, 2006). Lack of commitment by the couples results in a variety of problems within the relationship. Suppose such individuals fail to address the issue. In that case, most appropriately, it can end up ruining the marriage. It results in infidelity to the couples in the form of either emotional or physical affairs. The couples in the US fail to trust each other due to a lack of commitment resulting in serious damage to the marriage. That mostly takes place in the incidences where a full-blown marital affair occurs. In cases where the couples are not regularly intimate, including emotionally and physically, it leads to wearing down feelings of commitment. Meeting both the spouses' physical and emotional needs is important for the spouses' satisfaction in the relationship.

Without marital commitment, neither partner is focused on maintaining a healthy marriage. Although it is argued that both moral and structural commitment may lead to an intact relationship, that does not have an impact on the feelings of the couples towards one another. The existence of such factors means that the partners are dedicated to each other. However, it does not necessarily mean they are dedicated to their marriage. That means they are never dedicated to ensuring that the other partner is happy or making the marriage a happy and successful one, one of the most significant components of a healthy marriage (Kennedy & Ruggles, 2014). The majority of couples in the US are committed to the idea of marriage towards their partner, affecting their expression of interest or affection to the other spouse. As much as most couples in the US try to be committed to their relationship, they end up being either morally or structurally committed hence presenting a greater risk of divorce.

Financial Problems

Debt can draw a wedge between a couple and cause unwanted stress. It is not a secret that debt is one of the leading causes of stress within most marriages in the US. Debt continues to serve as a stand-alone stressor hence amplifying to problems within a marriage. Debt in some marriages accumulates as a result of secrecy in spending by one of the spouses and the existence of disagreements on various means of handling their finances (Poortman, 2005). Money is perceived as a form of emotional currency within the marriages, which can be used as a communication channel of some messages that cannot be addressed in the word form. Once the couples misuse money resulting in unpaid debt, there is where the problems begin. Although most couples perceive debt as a deal-breaker, it serves as the key cause of dishonesty, resulting in a lack of commitment by such couples.

Bad spending habits and inability to save could lead to improper handling of important bills. The majority of the couples never get married to eventually get divorced. However, financial issues finally end up being one of the key reasons they divorce. The existence of differences in money management from both couples in most cases results to divorce. That takes place when one of the partners starts being reckless with their money or even being negligent, affecting the other partner negatively and the general longevity of their marriage. Failure to handle important bills leads to frequent arguments between couples. The bad spending serves as one of the key causes of a struggling economy within the marriage, making things even worse (Poortman, 2005). If one understands that money management is an issue, then it is always advisable to deal with the issue head-on immediately.

Little to no Premarital Counselling

Marital counseling equips couples with the tools needed to make the most important decision of their lives. Since getting married is much more of an important life decision, doing it well requires receiving premature counseling to have a healthier relationship. Premarital counseling is for relationships with existing problems since the couples can use such guidance and training for any unknown adventure. Failure to attend premarital counseling makes the couples lack an opportunity to dig up into any potential pitfalls that could affect their marriage from lasting forever. The couples lack an opportunity to consider and discuss some of the most significant things that may increase their chances of having a successful marriage (Williamson et al., 2018). Little to no premarital counseling makes the partners lack an opportunity of getting outside opinions. That means they lack a change in accessing an outside perspective of their relationship and some of the techniques they can use to make it long-lasting.

When couples do not take the initiative to seek counseling before marriage, they are not aware of properly addressing personal issues without making matters worse. Premarital counseling helps recognize and resolve some of the existing conflicts within the marriage hence improving their relationship. Seeking counseling before marriage can help the couples make thoughtful decisions that may help rebuild and strengthen their relationship instead of the couples going their separate ways. Addressing personal issues without necessarily making them worse results from better communication, which is a sign of commitment (Williamson et al., 2018). Failure to address personal issues may result in domestic issues and sometimes result in violence, which escalates to a point where both spouses start getting afraid of the other. Therefore, it is always important to seek marriage counseling, which is always successful by finding a fit for both partners.

Conclusion

Lack of commitment, financial problems, and minimal or no marital counseling are extreme reasons that have contributed to the rise of divorce today. The ignorance of people feeling that divorce rates have been the same throughout history does not help that divorce rates are increasing. Divorce amongst couples can be avoided if each partner agrees to share the load of problems and seek to strengthen their marriage's weak areas.

Annotated Bibliography

Clarke-Stewart, A., & Brentano, C. (2006). Divorce: Causes and Consequences. New Haven: Yale University Press. The authors provide the audience with significant information concerning the marriage dissolution. The highlight some of the positive results of marriages once the couples have agreed on taking the right action while dealing with their marriage issues. The authors still provide information on how the negative effects may affect the children, which may be evident in their future marriages. The authors support their information by using some of the existing scientific evidence concerning the myths of divorce. It is always important for people to understand some of the most significant causes of divorce and why the problems affecting marriages should always be fixed.

Kennedy, S., & Ruggles, S. (2014). Breaking Up Is Hard to Count: The Rise of Divorce in the United States, 1980-2010. Demography, 587-598. The authors discuss the divorce changes that have been taking place in the United States. The article presents information on how divorce cases have been increasing dramatically over the last years. The authors offer a discussion on the changes in divorce cases based on age groups. There are many inconsistencies of divorce data that most people use for reference, which can play a significant part in the provision of statistics concerning marital instability.

Poortman, A. (2005). How work affects divorce. The mediating role of financial and time pressures. Journal of family issues, 168-195. The author provides information on the negative effects of financial problems on most marriages' stability. The article supports the idea that the higher the financial problems, the higher the chances of divorcing. The author still provides information on the significant commitment in a marriage and the negative consequences of a lack of such commitment. Commitment can be caused by the excessive working hours where the other partner starts feeling that they are not being loved sufficiently, resulting in the desire to separate or even feel isolated.

Scott, S. B., Rhoades, G. K., Stanley, S. M., Allen, E. S., & Markman, H. J. (2013). Reasons for divorce and recollections of premarital intervention: Implications for improving relationship education. Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice, 131-145. The author provides information about the most significant causes of divorce and some of their commonalities. The article uses some families as an exhibition of how they have failed and how they have continued failing over time. The author presents information on how premarital counseling has played a greater role in many marriages' stability. Such counseling helps provide information about the increasing incidences in divorce and how the families can keep away from such problems.

Williamson, H. C., Hammett, J. F., Ross, J. M., Karney, B. R., & Bradbury, T. N. (2018). Premarital education and later relationship help-seeking. Journal of Family Psychology, 276-281. Most of the couples fail to seek premarital counseling acts as the key cause of stress in their marriages. The author issues information on the significance of premarital counseling before marriage. The authors prove that most of the couples that prioritized to seek education first had successful marriages. The article helps compare the couples who had marital counseling before their marriage and those that did not.

References

Clarke-Stewart, A., & Brentano, C. (2006). Divorce: Causes and Consequences. New Haven: Yale University Press.

Kennedy, S., & Ruggles, S. (2014). Breaking Up Is Hard to Count: The Rise of Divorce in the United States, 1980-2010. Demography, 587-598.

Poortman, A. (2005). How work affects divorce. The mediating role of financial and time pressures. Journal of family issues, 168-195.

Scott, S. B., Rhoades, G. K., Stanley, S. M., Allen, E. S., & Markman, H. J. (2013). Reasons for divorce and recollections of premarital intervention: Implications for improving relationship education. Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice, 131-145.

Williamson, H. C., Hammett, J. F., Ross, J. M., Karney, B. R., & Bradbury, T. N. (2018). Premarital education and later relationship help-seeking. Journal of Family Psychology, 276-281.