Essay Sample on Preventing Unnecessary Divorce

Couple therapy researcher Constance Stites cited that almost every marriage with violence cases can be treated. The causes of divorce can fall under two classes; hard and soft. Hard reasons include addictions, abuse, and affairs that erode trust and safety in marriages. Soft reasons such as misunderstanding and lack of intimacy are turning out to be the leading causes of divorce in the recent generation. Almost every serious person in a marriage can be able to solve any dispute between the couple. Avoiding blame can also be a safe marriage in that spouses tend to blame each other for conflicts between the two. Al-Anon meetings can change the bearing of wives in alcoholic marriages. Being positive before quitting a relationship gives the union a chance to survive and also acts as a reason for future marriages in case the current one ends. Talking to each other when one is upset always cools the angry subject bringing the two of you together.

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Avoiding the term divorce creates a friendly environment to solve conflicts in any relationship. Wives contribute almost two-thirds of separations; they should find ways to solve problems instead of developing friendships with the husband's friends that kill the marriage. By terming the husband as not good enough, the divorce starts. An attitude change can avoid unnecessary divorce in that one should control unreasonable disputes. In most cases, wives handle marriages as a customer instead of being the owner and leaders, and this endangers the union. In new alliances, the new couple needs a lot of advice from the community to avoid future disputes; hence they should be close to friends and family. Not giving up in fighting for a companion guarantees its survival and avoids unnecessary divorce. Additionally, avoiding focusing on one's weaknesses can save a marriage on the brink of falling apart. Most couples have creative ritual connections.

Connection Rituals in Everyday Life

Being intentional about the connection rituals of everyday life is significant in building a stable marriage. Considering this will make union smooth to the extent of making divorce lawyers jobless. Ceremonies refer to social interactions that are often repeated, coordinated, and significant, and are differentiated from routine by their significance. Greetings in the evening, going out for coffee and good-bye in the morning are good examples of connection rituals. Additionally, being in the garden, working together can create marital connections. The greeting can establish significant relationships between the couple; hence one should be keen on how the spouse receives the address. Doing simple things such as walking to the kitchen and hugging your wife after work creates a strong bond. As time goes, so do the rituals vanish, and they need to be reestablished, and many couples do not know when they are eroding.

Talking rituals are also a significant form of connection ritual, and it is essential to create time to have discussions. Having some talk time improves the understanding between the husband and wife. Daily talks bring about three stages; the first one is a clear transition that involves creating a ritual space and obeying it. The set time should be adhered to by both parties for it to be a ritual. The second stage is the enactment; here, the routine must be made a rule or a habit without failing. Doing logistical talks will automatically create a distraction and hence no connection. The final phase is the exit that involves how to terminate a ritual. A proper and clear procedure should put in place to end it. For example, when making coffee in a talk ritual, drinking the coffee to empty is a high exit signal.

Love Rituals

Different people have varying perceptions regarding love marriage with some cultures that honor arranged marriages describing it as odd. Contrary to the love marriages, which starts on a high note and end slowly, arranged marriages start slowly and finally grow to something notable. Roses can be an excellent example of love rituals, even if there is no word written on it. Love rituals are always not meant for any outsider, but they end up in their ears. Even after marriage, love dating should not stop to ensure that the love rituals continue being stable. Going for a movie, dinner, talking a walk, and socializing with friends away from home gives a favorable talking environment, and it is where marital ritual starts. In most incidents, the talk will not be about the movie or the ride; it will always evolve around the couple.

Sex plays several roles, such as making babies, recreation physical release, as well as being a love ritual. Like other rituals, sex can be critical in marriage if it is made regular in any relationship. For sex to be a full ritual, it must be repeated and also coordinated. Going to bed together bring physical closeness and always helps in solving some conflicts. Love and intimacy rituals are difficult to distinguish, as they all give mutual self-disclosure. Intimacy rituals are significant in courtship and end up being an achievement in marriage. Many find it challenging to maintain intimacy in marriage because it takes a high degree of self-definition to stay together. Creating a conducive environment and hoping for the best is all a couple can do in developing intimacy ritual. Love rituals can be indicators of connection and love a well as healing stimulator.

Anniversaries and Other Special Occasions

Marriage life is a daily routine with ups and downs, and special occasions such as valentine, birthdays, and anniversaries keep it moving. During these occasions, ' expensive gifts that, if present daily, would be challenging, are the order of the day. Many people do not value the wedding anniversaries as the attention is on other things. Anniversaries always act as a revival for marriage and love. The ritual can be expensive or even a simple, something like a call to say I love you. Adding small rituals such as words of emotional intimacy can deepen the anniversary ritual. Anniversaries give couples a great chance to express feeling hence establishing some understanding between the couple. It is also necessary to discuss which rituals to exchange as part of the anniversary and be aware of them.

Taking a trip away together can be the most excellent idea of spending the time shared will give plenty of time to rejuvenate the love. Although valentine's day may not be a full ritual, it is vital to recognize the day. By not considering this day, you may end up upsetting your soulmate, which is not good. The valentine's day only seems a powerful ritual to the new lovers in most cases. Birthdays bring a reminder that marriages are cross-cultural experiences. Celebrating the birthday is a common thing to the kids, but it fades as one becomes an adult, although some are very aware of this day. Different couples develop special occasions that are different from the common ones. The events may be on days such as new year's day, new year's eve, or Christmas day. Having a special occasion to rejuvenate love brings high energy in any relationship or marriage.

Every Marriage Supported by a Community

Friends support each marriage and the community at large hence no marriage is an island. The community will have specific impacts in case a divorce occurs, and the effect increases with the duration of the wedding. Marriage is not a private thing; it is entirely a public affair between the couple and the community. The society or friends can stop a marriage from experiencing the wrath of divorce. Unfortunately, many do not experience such a community that can solve problems. Studies show that marriages developed around good friends are very satisfying. The cultural assumption that marriage lives are only for the couples involved to bring the incidence of the community not being into marriages. Almost everyone feels free to as about dating, but once in marriage, it becomes a zone of isolation and privacy.

Women who discuss their marriage issues with good friends have healthy families. Problems associated with couples are shared from one pair to another, and sharing the problem will give a platform for one to know they are not alone. As couples share experience, others can gain wisdom from couples who had been through the same challenge. Being in a solitary marriage leaves couples to suffer distress alone and often announce unexpected divorce. Distressed spouse shares their information with people going through the same problems, ending up getting any assistance. In the past, sharing issues were the order of the day, and this continues in most non-Western cultures. With this kind of support, marriages are more reliable due to advice from the community. The couples should have discussions about their problems, attend counseling events, and complement marriage, which one likes. The society should create an education forum, hold public rituals, and help couples in solving conflicts.

Taking Action for Your Marriage

Marital survival needs one to be in control of his/her marriage as it will guarantee few or no mistakes. Some information or course of action may bring challenges or even end up causing divorce. After accessing the data, one should also involve the spouse to avoid conflicts when administering the advice acquired. Additionally, one may decide to surprise the soulmate by adopting only the great ideas obtained. In this scenario, only a better marital ritual needs to improve the marriage. The changes will cause a disturbance in the already-established marriage. Some approaches need to be put in place to avoid distracting the family, with the indirect techniques being the most appropriate. Creating something familiar in the marriage can help in initiating something that connects to the already existing and makes it regular. Adding wisdom to bring the changes ensures that the changes will be assimilated without any challenges.

Introducing new rituals such as planning a date without making any comments will bring no harm. Make sure that the date will be excellent to gain support from the spouse. Additionally, one may introduce a new idea by just making a suggestion, and it should not be a command. Stating needs can also be the right way to initiate new techniques; the unique needs will give a chance for future changes. Coming up with an idea for a suggested need and not pushing for a decision will ensure that your new comment will not stress the partner. Moreover, suggesting an idea and giving it a try works better if one had already raised the topic. In some cases, you need to develop a big picture of the relationship with the new changes.